It's Too Ugly, It Must Not Be True

    As I read Dan Wetzel's story on the guilty verdicts for Sandusky, my heart openly sobbed. Wetzel's piece drives the point home about Juror #4 taking eight minutes to enunciate each of the counts and guilty verdicts against Jerry Sandusky. The story then continues on and describes the reactions of the Sandusky family, the victims and the jubilation reverberating throughout the courthouse. Most profoundly moving was the regret of the victim that did not come forward sooner and  by doing so may have prevented more victims from abuse, the frustration of the police with the District Attorney and the Assistant Coach that turned it over to Penn State to handle to learn that they didn't.
  
     I sobbed for the victims, the jurors, the town who in some ways must feel violated and betrayed and the mother who forced her son to continue to go back and now suffers immense pain for only wanting a father figure for her son. She was not wrong, she too, was betrayed. After I read Wetzel's article I felt incredible pain for Sandusky's Soul. The man stood there without emotion. His family sobbed and were horrified at the jury, yet, he stood there as if he had no feelings. Perhaps he was emotionally prepared or he is still in denial.

    Above all, my heart bled for humanity. How many people will rejoice at the loss of life?  How many will take the seat of Judgment and spew forth their venom? How many will support Sandusky's lifestyle choices?
  
   As a victim of sexual crimes, I know what Jerry has done to his victims and I know their scars.  I wonder what his wife must have thought when she knew she was not allowed in the basement during those times he was with a victim. What about his children? Could none of them see the pain or shame in the eyes of the victims? Have we as a whole quit looking into the eyes, the soul of others? Is it much easier to not see than to live a life of love? Will they begin to question the past or their actions?
  
   I do hurt for Sandusky. He has lost his soul or at the very least his Ego has cut him off from it. How dark it must be to be able to use a charity to find a pool of vulnerable victims. How lost is his Soul? How far removed? Is it possible for Sandusky to touch it again, to retrieve it? Can he ever know his Creator? Will the darkness that permeates his Being ever allow him to feel again?
 
   Will we as a whole be able to pray for all of the victims and all affected by this wake of truth? Can we find it in our hearts to pray for the family of Sandusky and he himself? What does reaction say about us as humans? What does our most inner knowing, our Soul compel us to do?
  
    Sandusky's behavior is not condoned, nor is the choices made by those who chose not to see the truth. I do not believe that they covered up for Sandusky, I believe that the truth was too ugly and it was much easier to believe Sandusky. How can I say this? I lived it. In all truth, I lived it. Glory to the Coach who saves children, it must be a witch hunt. I lived the frustation of the victims. The point is I am not taking Sandusky's side, nor approving his behavior.I am not persecuting those who should have done something and didn't. What is important is what they do with what we have all learned from this story. What each walks away with from this story and what we will or will not choose to see and hear from now on is important. We are the victim, the town, the assistant coach, the D.A. and in some small way when we ignore the pain of others, we are Sandusky. We are One.