It Doesn't Feel Right- Listening to Messages From Your Soul

    If you lived to be seventy years old and were paid one dollar for each year you lived, including leap years, you would earn approximately $25,830.00   The value of our days cannot be in money, but in how wisely we spent our days. The question is, "How do you live each day to the fullest?"  I may not have the exact answer to the question, but I have come to an understanding about is not living each moment or day to the fullest.  My heart and soul loves to sing, not melodically, but sing with joy and pleasure.  Sometimes, in order for my heart and soul to sing, I immerse myself in Faith and walk out on a long, dangerous limb and begin pruning away all that does not support my Highest Good from my Tree of Life, from my Universe.  This does not take courage or wisdom, it only requires that I listen to my feelings, I listen to my soul.  Our souls constantly communicate with us, we need to learn the signs and the language.

   The language is one we speak already. For example, I thought I wanted a teaching job, but while considering the application I noticed my chest and stomach muscles tightened. I decided to test this feeling and I visualized myself teaching in that particular space and place and the tightness worsened.  Years ago, my daughter and I shared the same experience of listening to our soul. My friend's daughter joined us at the restaurant table and as she took her seat she gave an excuse as to why she was late; I felt as if my body was in total arrest, the words didn't feel right, but I stayed silent and listened. After lunch, my teenage daughter confided she didn't feel right about the excuse for being late offered by her friend. Sometimes, we can feel uncomfortable with what is not said or done as what had occurred with my late sister.  I still feel absolutely ashamed that I did not answer my sister's calls; each time the telephone rang, I dreaded answering it and I believed I did not have the energy to answer it.  In hindsight, I now realize that I could not speak to her for to hear her truth would have forced me to see I shared the same truth of horror. Yes, something was not right, it didn't feel right for her or for me.

   Our souls try to communicate with us many times with good feelings as well as feelings of discomfort.  This uncomfortable feeling is not relegated to only people, but happens with issues, situations and homes as well.  You may avoid an area of your home because a hole in the wall needs fixed or the wall needs cleaned or painted. You may stay inside the house because your yard needs mowed, the garden has been neglected or the door needs some TLC. We avoid confronting the child who sleeps at inappropriate hours or is behaving out of character,  yet, we know something doesn't feel right.  Perhaps, there is a relationship you are in that needs ended, but you find reasons for all of the discomfort and sadness to avoid the fact that the relationship does not feel right.

     In reality, not doing anything about whatever it is that does not feel right steals your energy like a vacuum.  Those nagging people in our lives and the squeaky wheel gets all of our attention in our minds and sometimes they evoke emotions of anger, sadness, frustration and resentment. These responses  and any other responses that are less than love feeds our energy to the elephant, the problem in the room or the issue, depleting our energies. Quite often in order to attempt to avoid experiencing displeasure, we do not make any attempt to correct, address, repair, question or scrutinize the elephant in the room and the choice to ignore the issue, the elephant in the room that "doesn't feel right" spawns a feeling doom that seems to grow over time.

    Suppressing feelings of discomfort is unhealthy for us.  Even the discomfort from our physical environment such as a closet that needs emptied or a kitchen that is overwhelmingly unorganized and packed can affect our emotional, physical and spiritual health.  We are energetic beings and these feelings and thoughts that we have swept under the rug become blockages in our bodies, blocking our systems from healing and repairing.  Acupuncturists use the meridians which are paths of energy that run though-out our physical body to keep us in excellent health and emotional wellness.  There have been times when the practitioner could not find the meridians on the client.  As an Integrated Energy Therapist, I remove these blockages and restore the connection in the meridians restoring the flow of energy.   Blockages come from our energy field outside of our bodies and move into our physical bodies. These blockages are dis-ease.  The blockages are from not being at ease;  "dis" means "not".  "Dis- Ease" -- "Not at Ease".  It is important to acknowledge when we are not at ease in order to prevent illness. 

     It really isn't important to know it is bad Feng Shui to have a mirror face out the window, but it is wise to be aware of  a room that does not feel right.  If a room does not feel right, move things around the room, with each piece moved it may be that  another one may need to be moved. The items that make up your space are like stars in a constellation, each piece plays energetically upon another including the art work and mirrors.  Moving your constellation in your sacred space, your universe must feel right.  Allow yourself to feel it out.  It isn't in your head, you can't see it (though there are a few that can), you must relax and allow yourself to feel with the center of your body. Move a piece or two then sit and feel, look around and feel each item.  Unfortunately, it is not as easy to move people around in your life, but the people in your life have a huge impact on your energy and health as well.

   If  you have children, you may want to model a healthy way of life that is effective, efficient, respectful and healthy.   Looking back in our personal life at all the difficulties and pain we have endured, we can rejoice that we lived through them.  Not only did we survive, we learned from them and most often thrived.  There is no possible way anyone can thrive in any situation, relationship or space that does not support them.  If nothing you can do in these situations or relationships has changed it to "feel right" it never will. 

    It is wonderful and rewarding to give to others, but we buy this myth that it is a sign of weakness or it is an inconvenience if we personally ask for support or help, yet when others ask us for our assistance, we jump at the chance and never consider them weak or incompetent for asking.  Seeking out others is a sign of courage and faith.  Perhaps, a way to empower us to ask others to assist us is to see our request as a gift to them - a chance to be of help and to give to another human being. Try to see that we live in a symbiotic relationship with all life, including those we love and those we may not like.  We are not separate from the world around us, we are a part of our homes and they are part of us as it is so with the land, the sky, sun, moon and all of nature.  The fibers that make up your material world come from our Earth, they come from nature and they are chemically bonded together for your use just as your body is formed from the elements of our planet, chemically bonded for your use to have a physical experience.  Cherish the gifts of all living and non-living and as you do discover the changes around you and to you.

    It is important to utilize personal space to make life as it is to be.  Those in your life are a part of your universe and each player must dance with you in a dance that serves both of you. You and only you are responsible for you- your SELF.   If it feels right, your Soul is letting you know you are in harmony, if there is discomfort, your Soul is communicating with you the cause of the discomfort is not in your Highest Good.  If something moves you and feels right, it is. Faith means nothing has to make sense.  If it feels right, do it; if it doesn't feel right, don't. he moments in life are fleeting, make them yours and make them the best.

    
   

    

Crystals and Gems: Enhancing or Absconding Your Powers

         I love crystals, gems and stones.  They are delightful to behold and for me I feel much like the babe who sees the old time colorful Christmas lights for the first time. Shiny objects attract raccoons and I must confess, they attract me.  Seeing shiny objects, especially crystals is like taunting, "Look! Squirrel!" to a dog that loves to chase squirrels. Put a glistening crystal in my path or peripheral vision and you are going to lose my attention. Sooner or later, I am going to chase the squirrel.  

     Jewelry stores attract me like bears to honey. I float into the shop and gaze into the lighted cases and find myself smiling away. No, I do not have a need to buy a token or a prized possession; I am just happy being in the company of colorful treasures that twinkle like ice in the sunlight in a magical winter wonderland. I do not feel pulled to hold anything, but I do have a desire to touch the array of gems that is much worse than that of a three year old in a toy store. Crystals, diamonds, and minerals all beckon me to be home among them, but once our visit is finished I am happy to bid adieu and know that I am welcome to come back home anytime.

    Most children are attracted to the earth, to rocks, flowers and anything that glistens and shines.  It is quite amusing to stand in a crystal or rock shop and watch children of all ages walk into the shop and be pulled to a specific area or gem.  The relationship we have with the earth and her treasures is innate and real.  My earliest memories of the earth is looking up in awe of  blue skies, fluffy clouds and feeling familiar in the smell of wet earth; I was two years old, my memories of these are clear.

When I was three I would pick up rocks out of the parking lot next door or off the street.  There was a lot of quartz in the broken rock and I marveled at the different colors and wondered why anyone would drive on beautiful rocks. It never occurred to me to put one in my pocket to take it home or protect it. Children today have this same sense of respect. Back then, I would just hold the piece of rock, observe it, and then put the rock back where I found it. Today, I still observe this ritual when borrowing rocks and stones for use.  I do not own any crystals, gems or stones, but I have become a caretaker to many.

     By the way, do we really "own" crystals or rocks?  Come to think of it, do we really "own" a pet or a plant?  When I think of buying a dog, my stomach becomes knotted up and hurts, yet if I think I would like to become a caretaker of a dog, I feel butterflies swirling around my tummy.  Native American tradition offers  we do not "own" land, but instead we use or borrow the living Mother and we should give Thanks for the give away when we eat an animal or plant.  When we were children adults told us God lives everywhere and is in everything and this resonates with me. If Source is in all things, then all things have consciousness.  Crystals grow, therefore they are living things. How could I "own" one?

Largest Lemurian Quartz Cluster found

     The real purpose of this blog is not about living things or owning them, but the use of crystals and other treasures of our Mother Gaia which compel people have them in their possession for use or collecting.  We all appreciate the metaphysical properties- the gifts crystals, gems, minerals and metals  have to offer. For example, my husband had a necklace made for me by Allyson Rice. Allyson used the properties of the stones as well as geometric shapes in the gold chain. She used Citrine for clarity, manifestation, forward progress, strong will and powerful growth. It carries the energy of fire, helping one to active their own "fire in the belly," helping one with clarity of intentions, action and manifestation capabilities. The gold was deep, rich with warm energy of the sun.  Allyson wrote, "Everything about this necklace feels like suspended sunlight.... a reminder that to carry LIght so fully and shine it in the world, you have to be open to receive it as well."   I wore this necklace often in teaching difficult classes and I saw its properties affect others around me.  I did not rely on the gifts or metaphysical properties to do their work, but I did hold great gratitude for that which was given and received. It was and still is imperative to always maintain a state of being present and completely aware of everything and everyone which enables me to be proactive and reactive in a manner that is respectful, effective, efficient and even healing.

     Many of us use crystals, gems and stones as partners or tools in healing and in life. It is not uncommon to have them on our desk or in our pockets knowing they offer a service to us. Unfortunately, it is far too easy to depend upon the crystal or stone and abscond all responsibility to it. For example, someone desires help with their health and he or she chooses to  employ Rutilated Quartz which can activate nerves, boost the immune system and bring restoration to mental health as well as reduce signs of aging among many attributes. Yet, this man or woman does not take the steps to eat a balanced, healthy diet. He or she may smoke and drink excessively and choose to stay in an unhealthy relationship.  This man or woman is expecting the Rutilated Quartz to do the work as he or she relinquishes all responsibility and expects this magic to happen. The magic does happen, but one has to take the steps to help the process instead of hindering it. One has to be actively responsible for Self. Crystals and stones are conscious beings and just like the Angelic Realm, if your actions and thoughts do not align with your desires, you will not be assisted.  I suppose our actions in do speak louder than words.

Crown Jewels - London

     It is truly a Blessing to be helped by forces unseen by us.  Kings sought out the crystal, gems and minerals for their powers and properties. They adorned their crowns, robes, sword grips and pommels with specific gems and minerals.  Kings believed these would enhance their personal powers and abilities, but the kings did not place the crown upon their heads and expect their lives and kingdoms to magically become Camelot.  Kings held great trust in themselves as well as their world and did everything in their own power to make it happen.  We, too, must learn to embody the use of our worldly treasures while holding great Faith in ourselves as in our Creator as we take every step that we can to create the outcome we wish to experience. 

     It is absolutely delightful that the Western World is opening up to subtle energy and unseen forces. Yet, it is a concern that many of us still search for the "pill" to make it all go away without becoming fully involved with our own progress and growth. As we learn to step out of our comfort zones in our daily lives and experiences, we can trust that the Universe is with us, assisting us, but All That is will not replace our Free Will. Assistance does not mean the Universe replaces our actions as we remain inactive. We must  take action beginning in our hearts and mindfully follow through. We must be active participants in that which we seek to be and to have.

Hope Diamond

     By the way, the month of March is the best month to purchase jewelry. In acquiring new beloveds, always allow the stone to call to you. Be aware of the first one you see- the one you really see and delight in. Hold the stone and send it love. Ask the piece if it would like to be with you and notice any changes in your physical sensations.  Our Higher Self and Soul knows what we need. Trust your Self and your Soul as much as you trust the crystals, gems and stones. 

 

    As we release our need to rely on the illusion of the limitations of linear reality, our intuition becomes more and more frequent and more consistent.  After much practice with testing and listening to our intuition, we begin to glimpse and grow to trust the true nature of what Is. If we have not learned to begin to trust our intuition by now, we will soon, for each of us has had plenty of experience of wishing we had listened to these messages known as gut feelings or intuition.

   It is inevitable that we will each  learn to follow our own inner guidance, preferring it to the guidance being offered by other sources of information (people or beings).  For the very sense of separation that we seek to transcend is reinforced when we offer our power to another being who claims to have psychic powers- and they may well have these powers.  The information that may be provided us from any of these sources can only be validated by our inner knowingness.  The opportunity for each of us is to recognize that we have within us a remarkable barometer of what is and what is not. We can, and will learn to,  rely on this guidance and the information that lies within each of us.

   Information that is offered by another can only be as good as that person's filter of their own consciousness.  Yes, some are able to peek through the veils with varying degrees of accuracy and report what is sensed, heard or seen, but this vision of the other worlds is not wisdom. The Truth of another cannot be seen from another without bias or subjectivity. It cannot be accepted or perceived as wisdom.  There are are a rare number of us who have totally transcended the veils of illusion through their own personal journeys and I, personally, do not want to bet against the odds that the chosen psychic is precise and has totally transcended their own lessons and lifetimes in a moment of despair.

    As I have told clients, there are so many possible outcomes available to them for any situation.  The guidance I may offer- or see- would be one of many of an infinite field of possibilities.  To offer one from my perceived perspective would alter their choices and at the same time, the client exercising their free will would, by definition, alter the "prophecy" and render it invalid. (On a side note, if you tell others of your intentions or what you are manifesting, it most likely will not happen.  Keep your plans close to your heart.)

   There is always a message or meaning in all of our actions. If you or I went to another person for advice and asked them for guidance about the future, you or I would be making a statement, vibrationally, that the valid information you or I seek is not available to you or I personally. This is equal to doubting our own self and that in itself chokes the flow of our Inner Guidance or that which comes from Spirit/Source.

    It has become popular to invoke the help of sources beyond our physical world for guidance  and information. It is imperative to understand the different levels of consciousness and the number of levels of perspective that parallel their level of transformation. If these guides had had physical form, it is necessary to understand the information you receive from them is from their perspective.  These beings are "between lives" and in their guidance, may be attempting to influence you.  They are vibrationally reinforcing the ties and attachments they may have once had with you. If you choose to give your power to them, please remember that their advice is colored by their own issues perspective which have not healed or vanished just because they left physical form. If you have ever had someone channeled after death you have had the experience that their Soul still has the same personality or disposition.

     Guides and guardians are often no further along than we are in their spiritual unfoldment.  They are not necessarily All Knowing. Just because they are no longer in physical form does not make them wise. You would do well to trust your inner guidance and test for resonance within your Self.

     I must interject here that there are Angels, Illuminated Beings of Light, Archangels and other Beings that are available to us for guidance, but it must be noted that these Beings will not give us advice or show us the future. These Beings know that it is not in our best interest for them to interfere with our Free Will. They will not tell us what to do.  We are here to learn two things: 1) to be only responsible for our own Self and 1) to be of Universal Service.  By giving away our power in seeking the guidance for our actions and choices to another, we are absconding our reign. 

    Our inner guidance is found in the deep recesses of our mind, not our brain, our mind. This guidance is not in the forms of directive words, but this guidance does transcend all limitations and is simply ours in the form of knowingness. We are here having a physical experience to arrange for our own Selves experiences in which we will learn to overcome.  Another reason we find ourselves in a myriad of circumstances incarnate is to learn to rely on our inner guidance.  Each of us has found that when we have relied on the advice and guidance of another we have experienced more confusion and and or more distrusting of our own Self.   It is during these times when we are standing in a mire of choices or at a crossroad, it is the time to go within.  It is a time to grace ourselves with all the possibilities that may lead us in the right direction for your Highest Good and then allow our inner Knowingness to be felt.

    The clarity each of us seek when we are most challenged is attained in the realms that transcend the mind.  If there is a sense of urgency, we must scrutinize the cause of the urgency. If it is based on fear, it is not wise to make any choices or decisions.  Again, move into stillness and center.  It is imperative to remove our Self from the logical mind for the source of wisdom is not derived from logic.  The answers you need will be realized and made manifest when you trust that you hold the answers. All of the answers.

    To seek the answers of another is an action of dependency and desperation. When we truly understand and accept that there is no such thing as a bad choice or a wrong decision and that no matter what happens, the choice or decision we have made is indeed in our best interest, then we will truly understand that all of these exercises ARE the answer. Meaning, the "answers"  are not the answer. It is the Source of that answer that is being sought. We did not incarnate to live for the approval or direction of our family, friends and ancestors.  We incarnated in hopes to find the presence of Source within our own Self.

    There are many more moments in which each of us will have the opportunity to practice finding the answers to our questions from within our Self's.  The most exciting and fascinating aspect of this entire process is to discover that we do not need to Seek anything, including our Creator.  In every moment we discover that it is a moment of testing and we find ourselves wishing for direction is an opportunity to transcend the illusions of the prison of separation.  We each have come a long way to this very point of discovering what we wish to be or what we wish to know lies within. This is the very moment, the very point of time each of us may choose Faith and Trust that all we need to know is just a breath within.

                                                                                     

  

    

Through the Looking Glass- Are You Me?

     Though I have a twin, I have always felt as if I were adopted.  I felt different.  As a toddler and as a child I observed my world as an outsider looking in. I had an adult perspective on life and quite often felt more mature than the adults I encountered. I felt awkward on the playground and just as ill-fit  at home. It was not acceptable to ask others if I could play with them, I considered it rude; one must be invited and welcomed into a circle. Perhaps, in some way I had an experience or developed a belief in the cradle. Perhaps, it was the way of my Soul.
    
     It was late evening. A bedside lamp cast a soft yellow the other side of my parent's bed. My mother was lying in the middle, my twin sister nestled with her right arm and I on her left, my mother;s left arm was free to move. If I looked up past my mother's head on her right,  I could see the hall light shining brightly over the dark stair railing. The stillness of the home announced itself in this moment filling me with peace.  My mother's belly was heavy with child making it difficult to see over her.  My mother was softly talking to my twin as she lovingly stroked her and face. I clearly remember thinking, "I wish she would talk to me the way she talks to her." This would be the last thought I would ever choose to have concerning my perception of how each of us were treated as siblings. This was life and it was the way it was.

     On Saturday mornings in the first grade, I would write letters to my father's mother. Through the letters between my German grandmother and myself, I would feel an unspoken and unseen connection to another family in another world that accepted and loved me. My grandmother shared her family and reminded me of all the wonderful things about myself and encouraged me to do well.  As a first grader, I  read books on the fourth grade level in which I escaped my life momentarily living vicariously in the world of literature; once becoming the a young woman in a cave with a unicorn and once an orphan seeking a new family. I reveled in the freedom of changing my life in my minds eye. I loved the adventures taken from the safety of my own little corner, but the greatest gift of these treasured trips would be the ability to see from behind the eyes of another.

     When other third graders were trying to force classmates and friends to choose a side during one of their battles, it escaped my abilities to figure out why everyone wanted to be a part of stupid fight where no one was right or wrong and everyone else wasn't part of the disagreement.  Why would I want to hate someone who did not do something to me? Why would I be mad at the other child when I truly had no idea as to what really happened? I would often reflect upon my own actions, concerned that I may be guilty of some crime that might hurt someone in the same way. I remember in Jr. High being close to tears as I apologized to someone for possibly hurting their feelings inadvertently. This daily self-reflection continues today in all areas of my life. Did I react with mindfulness and compassion? Was I out of line? Were my words positive and clear? Could I have said it better?  Was I really the best I could be? How will I make it right?

     We all have beliefs, opinions and emotional responses to people, events, actions and places based on our own personal experiences. We see out of our eyes from a platform built by what we heard, the events that we physically and emotionally felt, what we witnessed and what we experienced through our own actions. In every moment, we hear or see something new and the person we were a second ago has changed in some way.  We may be touched in a way that we realize that we are blessed or we may sink further into a belief that no one can be trusted. We may be able to forgive a transgression which enables us to heal and change.

     There is another element in the Circle of LIfe. I refer to it as the Magical Mirror, the aspect of seeing our own behavior good and bad through those we encounter.

Mirror, mirror on the wall, reflect to me the gifts and faults I reflect to all.

To use our mirror, we just remain non-judgmental, especially about our Self. We must put our emotions aside, they are just energy in motion (e-motions).  Emotions are not feelings, emotions are energies we experience based on beliefs and experiences. We heal or do not heal based on our choice to see our experience from love or otherwise.

     We may choose to forgive- or not.  We may choose to move on - or not. We may choose to feel anger and hold a grudge- or not. Despite our choices, we do not see. We become caught up in the emotions rendering us helpless to understand that we are not the only ones hurting. We see the story of one our side, but we fail to see that perhaps we may have been party to the problem.  "Mary" grew up with her childhood friend, "Elizabeth" well into their late forties. They raised hell, laughed hard, loved hard and shared secrets. One day, as a result of many conversations with a mutual friend of Mary and Elizabeth, Mary concluded Elizabeth used her as the brunt of jokes in front of other people, ridiculed her, demanded her to stop being emotional and Elizabeth talked about Mary as if she were not present. Mary found the courage and resolve to restore her dignity and take back her life.  Defining her new boundaries, Mary made the difficult, but necessary choice to love herself more than she loved Elizabeth.

     With heavy sadness Mary parted ways with Elizabeth and moved on. Mary remains unaware of the silver lining in this act of self love. At that time, Mary could not and still does not see that Elizabeth was and is a mirror of her own behavior.  Mary, herself, behaves in the same manner toward those she loves in her close friendship and family circles.  She judges actions and motives, ridicules, shares secrets and divulges vulnerabilities. Mary prefers making many new friends over cultivating a more trusting and loving relationship with those who love her. She forgives friends and overlooks their faults, but is unable to do the same with family.  Choosing sides as she did in childhood in the effort to fit in still continues for Mary, but in a more subtle manner. She has changed, but being conscious and questioning the meaning of her daily interactions with others eludes her as it does for most of us. 
    
     Unfortunately, without the mindful considerations of her suffering by Elizabeth;s actions; the very same actions that she herself commits, Mary will suffer the same scenario again and again. .Like all of us who do not see ourselves in the mirror, Mary will continue to have friends that betray her trust in the very manner in which Elizabeth hurt her. As Mary learns more sophisticated and invisible acts of attaining power and protecting her image through harmful words and actions, her Soul will continue to remind her of what she is here to overcome and learn by arranging for new situations that mirror Mary in the faces of others. This is not to say that Mary's most wonderful, compassionate and loving deeds will not be returned to her, they will, tenfold. The intention is to be mindful as to whether the source of our own frustration and pain is indeed our own Self's actions being reflected through our Magical Mirror.

     As you live, you shall receive isn't just about karma, it is also about learning and rising above human nature.When we forget why we are here in physical form and what our Souls need to heal, we are reminded through our experiences and quite often than not, painfully so. It is imperative to acknowledge that when we are on the receiving end, we may be learning our own lesson or we may be in a mutual agreement to help each other rise above an experience .  Quite often, we become frustrated, angry or hurt at the person who is acting out the very behaviors we are most guilty of.  we cannot or in some cases, will not see ourselves in this magical mirror provided for us to overcome another obstacle for our Soul and Higher Self to rise in standing with our Creator.